1.05.2009

thank you des

des, friend,

i thank you for the happy, wacky memories. the road to realizing our dreams could have been one tough ride but we had fun, hadn't we? crazy, funny, smart little lady with chinky eyes and a welcoming smile.

you knew then it was kinda big and looming. you just had the sense not to frighten us. or maybe cleng realized already being the matured person that she always is. and it was only me on my side of the fence. clueless, autistic me.

remember that afternoon walk we had, crossing the sunken garden, going to NIGS? you jokingly asked me if i could be a sperm donor should you need one. and i jokingly said yes. well that was all before you met buboy and went even crazier than the crazy lady you already were. that was before we took the board exam and went to top with flying colors. remember that little conversation we had with ronald, that one saturday, again at the sunken garden? hehehe. it all came true. freaked me out, but it did came true ;)

of course after that, we all got a little busy trying to mend our own little lives and careers. we kept in touch but somehow along the way, distance made us drift further apart... my seatmate, lunchmate, brothers' burger comrade... i missed you.

when i learned the news, i immediately wanted to see you.. but you didn't want pity. you played it tough and said you were doing ok already; and that you're already readying yourself to go back to teaching in our beloved college. courageous words. or did you secretly hate me for not being there? i loathe myself for not being there when you have needed an extra shoulder to lean on. cleng will surely kill me had she known. futile efforts from an inconsistent friend. will you ever forgive me?

you left us grieving on the second day of the new year.

i love you des. i will always think of you. rest now, my friend.

10 comments:

cyndirellaz said...

ang ganda ng sulat na ito, just want to know, are you going to send it? i wish so!!!

lucas said...

one of my closest girl friends also asked me the same question about being a sperm donor for her... i jokingly said yes...

it turned out she was being serious... hehe!

~yAnaH~ said...

sad..
there;s pain..
i felt it...

Beaugarte said...

Letting go will always be hard to do, but writing about helps, in so many ways.

I hope you get through this soon.

Mr. Scheez said...

How sad. =(

wanderingcommuter said...

aaaawwww.. condolence.

carina said...

kaya pala. nuon ko pa nga gusto itanong bakit parang biglang di na kayo close (pansin ko lang). i'm sure des will still give you that welcoming smile despite what happened.

gentle said...

to everyone, thank you for the words of consolation. i know this grief is not as deep as her mom's grief but i'm sharing the burden in my own little way as a friend. this post is for you des.

Mugen said...

I am very sorry to hear the news dude. Please accept my condolence.

gravity said...

this post made me cry...
i wish you strength..